TIRED

I am tired of many things... today I want to get some of that off my back so just bare with me....

I am tired of being left out. I get accused of not being friendly, and not wanting to join in when really that is not the case. I want to join and I try to be friendly all the time. I often offer to help people out even when I have other things I need to do. I invite people to do things with me, too. Mostly, I would love just to be able to do stuff with my "friends". I go almost every where alone and that gets tiresome. I go to eat on Sundays with people but now I believe that they are just tolerating me or they feel like it is an obligation they have to fulfill. After what I experienced today I think I will stop going on Sundays to eat and stop trying to do anything with anyone. I am tired of being lonely but I am more tired of being hurt! I think being alone hurts less...

I am tired of being told I am mean or hateful. I am not! I have a shell that I let few in, that doesn't make me mean, it makes me sheltered. I am trying to break those walls, yet when things happen like they have today, it makes me put the shell pieces back up and hide again. I love all people, I have said this many times there is not one person in the world I can say I do not love, I might not like someone but I love everyone. The wall is now up and I am sad... I have worked hard to break it down as much as I have. I wonder if it is worth the trouble.

So, now I have vented, I am sure it makes no sense... that is ok... I am just tired.... mostly of being me! Because mostly this is all my own fault!

Lord, help me not to let what has happened to effect my relationship with you or change who I am becoming. I need to just move passed it as I usually do and not let it bother me. I am sure the persons involved don't even know they did anything to upset me. It is all ok, I will just need to work on trying to be your friend instead of trying to look for friends here. Thanks for being here for me Lord.

The Quote:

"We can be tired, weary, and emotionally distraught, but after spending time alone with God, we find that He injects into our bodies energy, power, and strength." ~Charles Stanley

The Drawing:

UNIQUE

Yesterday I said that in our differences we find our uniqueness. I believe this to be true. No 2 people are exactly alike, not even identical twins. We are all different in some way.

In this world you will never find two snowflakes exactly alike and an artist no matter how much they try can not produce 2 works of art exactly alike. Even is something if molded there is always a subtle difference.

So what makes you different? What makes you unique? What have you been given in your character or abilities that make you standout? These are questions I guess we all need to ask at some point in life. If we are a christian that uniqueness is something God will want to use to further His work on earth through you.

Many people think that in order to work for the Lord or to be an asset to God's Kingdom they have to have a super awesome talent or an ability that no one else has. They think they have to be able to sing like an angel, or speak with the eloquence of a great orator. They have to have a heart bigger that anyone else or pockets deeper than Trumps. That could not be further from the truth. God wants us to be unique in the way He has made us unique, we may only able to make a joyful "noise", or be able to only give $5.00 or less. The smallest talent, the smallest gift is BIG in the eyes of God if it is given and used with the right motives, rather with no motive at all, other than to please Him.

If all you have to give is a hug or a prayer, do it. Never think that your uniqueness is not special just because someone else does something better. If you use it to honor God, He will use it to grow His Kingdom. Let God use your uniqueness for His work here on earth.

Lord, thank-you for the uniqueness you have given to every person on earth. I know sometimes I have a hard time excepting that you can use my uniqueness in any way. Then I remember you can do anything you want to do. Help me Lord to be willing to use all you have given me to honor and glorify you!

The Quote:

"I believe that every person has uniqueness, something that nobody else has." ~Michael Schenker

The Drawing:

CHALLENGE

I have this person in my life who often gives me challenges for various reasons. Today, as we talked, they did that again, and I am not really sure of the reason for this one.... This challenge I told them I would not do, yet here I am doing it, even though I am not sure how to go about it.

I believe I have spoken about spiritual gifts a few times here. God has given us all gifts to use to further His story, His kingdom, and to give Him glory. Everyone can not have the same gift, if they did the world would be a rather strange place. Think about that really... What if every tree was a pine tree, every flower a rose, or the sky was always over cast? What if every person could be an artist, a singer, or a mathematician? God made differences for a reason and in those differences we find our uniqueness.

So the challenge was to talk about my spiritual gifts. If anyone knows me well, they know I do not like to talk about myself. I may vent, or talk about experiences, but I never really talk about who I am. There are many reasons for that and those will stay unsaid. I am finding this hard to do....

I have said before that I am a very hard person to get to know and my past has a lot to do with that. God has given me a gift that is so not in line with who I have allowed myself to become, because of past experiences. One gift He has given me is compassion or mercy, and I know that many people who know me in person are think right now.... um NO! Like I said the outward me has a hard shell and a hard time letting the spiritual me show itself. God is working on that, as I am.

Sometimes, I wonder why God chose to give me this gift, why not administration since I am such a "hard" person to get to know and sometimes rough toward people. And right now I just thought of the reason, because He knew that with all that I have been through in my life, I would have to have compassion for others to make it through the rest of it. It is compassion that draws me to people, the ones that are hurting just like me, the ones that need a hand to hold or a shoulder to cry on and someone that will be there when others won't. My compassion is not always outward either, but I can tell you now, if you have asked for prayer, or even look like you need prayer, whether I said I would pray or not... I have. I don't do this in my power because I can't, God has given me this compassion and I praise Him for it, even when it hurts me. There are times I wish I could walk by someone who is hurting, lonely, or needy and feel nothing.... It just does not happen, and I am glad.

My other spiritual gift is teaching. Even though I am not good at writing this blog or getting the point across in a way everyone can understand, this is a form of teaching. I teach as my profession and I teach in Sunday School. It is not in my power that I do anything I do, it is in God's. If I am doing it in my power then it is for nothing, I hope that I am doing it with God and for Him.

Well, I am not sure if this is what you, my challenging friend, expected.... I did what I felt in my heart. Even though I said I wouldn't... Thanks for pushing me.

Lord, thank-you for friends who challenge us, and for gifts that compel us to do work for you. Thank-you for giving me the gift of compassion even though many times it leaves me raw and vulnerable, which I do not like. You knew that I would need compassion for a reason, your ways are not our ways and your thoughts are not our thoughts. Thank-you!

The Quote: I could not find
a quote that conveyed the idea of this blog... but here is something I thought of...

Because of the love and compassion the people of Whoville had for each other... the Grinch's Heart grew 3 sizes... just imagine what compassion can do in real life... 

"And what happened then? Well, in Whoville they say that the Grinch's heart grew three sizes that day." ~ Dr. Suess

The Drawing:

FAITHFUL

I have debated over the word for this entry today, I think that I have found it, although willingness has a lot to do with the subject also. Since this is the word in the quote I will use it.

Faithful... may not be exactly what we expect in this passage of the bible. In Matthew 25 verses 14 - 30 Jesus tells the parable of the Talents. It basically goes like this, There was a man who was going away and left his household and business in the hands of his servants. He gave them each a portion to take care of and help grow according to the abilities he thought each had. So to one he gave 5 talents, to another 2, and to the last 1. While he was gone the one with 5 talents increased those by 5, the one with 2 also increased his by 2, and the last buried his in fear of having nothing when the master returned. So when the Master returned The two that had increased their talents were praised and told that because they were faithful with little he would make them masters of many. The other of course was called a lazy servant and told to depart from him. Now I know that I told the story a little different and Jesus was talking about working for the Kingdom of God. I will be too in a way.

God gives us all what He thinks we can handle. He sends help in ways that we may not see as helpful. The thing is that we have to be willing (there is that word) to step out with what he has provided (even if we think we need more) being a faithful servant in that small thing before He can give us more. If we are faithful in what we are given He will give us more. We have to be willing to start small, we can't expect to graduate from High School and become president of a major company over night. It is possible, but not probable. How many people have started at the bottom and worked their way up the ladder of success, even in the ministry.

There is another story that will illustrate this a bit too....

There was a man stranded in the middle of the ocean. The ship he was on had sunk, all he had was the clothes on his back and a deflating life preserver. So helpless and alone he called out to God, "God, please bring me a miracle! Rescue me! Send your angels to save me! Get me out of here!" No more than 5 minutes later a boat came by and offered him help. He refused, "I don't need your boat, God is going to rescue me." About 30 minutes later helicopter hovered over him and offered him a rope ladder. He also told them, "No thanks, God is going to rescue me!" An hour went by, he could see in the distance a little island, he turn and started swimming back out to the middle of the ocean, thinking "I don't want to be on an island, God is going to save me!" Shortly after this the man drown and was in heaven. He was very angry, so when he saw God he asked Him, "God, I prayed for you to save me, why didn't you?" God looked at him and said, I sent you a boat, a helicopter, and an island! Why didn't you use them?"

Many times we hold out for the grand miracle like angels swooping down and fixing all of our problems. God sent the man in the story 3 angels, they were just not the angels the man expected or wanted. We have to be willing and faithful enough to except the small things God sends our way to help us in this life. We may need transportation, we want a car, he sends us a bike. We may need need a place to live, we want our own house, he sends us a bed in someone's house. God sends us what we can handle, and as we are faithful (and willing to take it) in the little He then gives us more.

Lord, help me to be faithful with the things you have given me. Help me to be willing to use those until you think I am ready for more. I want to be like the servant who had 5 talents and increased them by 5. Thank-you Lord for all you have given me.

The Quote:

"His lord said to him, Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord." ~Matthew 25:21

The Drawing:

EXPERIMENT

It is amazing where I get my inspiration for this blog sometimes. A friend of mine posted this picture on Facebook today....
I remember when posters and commercials had the same type of slogan that had to do with drugs. We could make this about anything. I of course did experiment with art, and even though I am not very good at it I love to be creative.  There are so many things that kids should experiment with, things that in the long run may help keep them from the negative influences of peer pressure and drugs. It isn't a promise but it can not hurt to give them the opportunity.

Kids should have the chance to experience sports, all kinds of sports. Someone may not be good at football, but awesome at soccer. Swimming might be just the right thing for another kid. There are so many active inside and outside activities that we all should try. I love tennis and basketball, I can no longer play them. I can shoot a basket ever now and then but any running can not be done.

Some kids don't like sports, or can not play for one reason or another. That does not mean there is nothing for them to do or experiment with. I had some of my students a few years ago make movies in my class. Many of them had fun, and a few seemed to really like it. I hope that those movies might have sparked a longing for them, that they have and will enjoy for years to come.

Photography is another area. I love photography and again I am not very good at it, but it gives me pleasure to frame a picture to capture a moment or scene. This is something I have done with my students also. I give them cameras and let them be the school photographers. I hope that will spark an interest in some of them.

I have allowed my students the opportunity to complete hand drawn art pieces and digital art. I see everyday the ones that I know have a desire to be creative.

As parents it is our job to nurture our children and see that they get a good education. I feel it is also our job to help them experience the things they enjoy in life without criticism or harsh words. What we say to or around our children will make or break their spirit. Even as adults our words can cause their spirits to diminish toward a goal. We need to encourage, even if that thing is not the thing we want them to do, not everyone can be a Doctor or Lawyer. The world would be a really sad place if we were.

There is one more thing that kids need to experiment with, well not really experiment but enjoy. That is a life lived for Jesus. The best thing I tried was Church, Faith, and God. It lead me to salvation and eternal life. Because I experimented by putting myself in church, I have a better life now. If you have not tried going to church, and spending time alone with God, maybe now is the time you did. You will be amazed at the things that will happen in your life if only you put yourself in His hands.

Lord, thank you for the ability to experiment. I think if we did not have the chance to try things in this world if we were all robots or puppets we would be a very unhappy bunch of people. You loved us enough to allow us choice, I pray that I make the right choices from now on and that those reading this blog will too.

The Quote:

"How could youths better learn to live than by at once trying the experiment of living?" ~Henry David Thoreau

The Drawing:

OUTSIDE

As I have stated in a previous blog I have been reading "not a fan" by Kyle Idleman. This book is a good one so far (slow reader here) I would recommend it based on the chapters I have read so far. This chapter has to do with the "sermon" Jesus is preaching in Matthew 23. I have always thought of these verses as just talking to a particular group of people, now I know and believe it is talking to everyone, all of us, for we all fall into this at some point or another. Maybe more than once. 

Jesus is in Jerusalem teaching as the Sadducees and Pharisees are standing around listening trying to find a cause to bring Him to court. Jesus knows their hearts and the hearts of every person there, remember Judas would have been standing there too. He was still apart of the 12 disciples at this point, he probably had not even had a thought of betraying Jesus yet. Jesus tells the people in the group to consider the scribes and Pharisees and how they seat in the seat of Moses and uphold the laws. And in the very first few sentences Jesus says, they tell you what to observe and do, but they do not do it. They were telling the people to love, worship, and honor, God in all that they do, yet they themselves were doing it only to be looked on with authority, and to get the best that they could here on earth. They did the things they did for the praise of man, and not to honor God. How many times do we do the things we do to be appreciated, to get recognition, and to honor ourselves? 

Now fast forward to the verses in the quote (Matthew 23:25-26), Jesus uses an analogy that every person in the world can understand. We all have utensils we use to eat with. We want those to be clean, but what if we only cleaned the outside so that people would "think" it was clean. Would we want to let someone use a cup like that? Jesus told the people that the Saduccees and Pharisees were like cups that had been cleaned up on the outside, but on the inside they were dirty. On the inside they had not taken care of business and they were not ready to meet their maker. Jesus told them to clean the inside first and the outside would take care of itself in the process. 

It is the same in our lives. Many time we try to make it look good to the people around us. We go to church, we sing in the choir, we give offerings, and we even volunteer, yet all the while that outward appearance is not what is really on the inside. On the inside we hide pride, unforgiveness, selfish ambitions, lust, and many other sins. Jesus said if we would clean those up, then everything else would fall into place. Is it an easy task, no! Can we do it? NO, not by ourselves, we need to allow Jesus to help us. With Him everything is possible. 

Lord, I am not totally clean on the inside and I know that, I have issues I need to deal with and get out of the way so that my whole vessel can be clean for you. Lord, please help me clean my cup up, so you can fill it to over flowing with all you have to give me. Thank-you Lord for your grace and mercy.

The Quote:

"Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you cleanse the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of extortion and self-indulgence. Blind Pharisee, first cleanse the inside of the cup and dish, that the outside nay be clean also. ~Matthew 23:25-26

The Drawing:

BELIEVE

The Quote:

"I believe in a faith that's strong, I believe in a hope that carries on, I believe in these things and more. Most of all, Most of all, I believe in Love."  ~Third Day - I Believe

When I first started this journey of this blog I posted what I believe to be true about God, salvation, the Bible, and  some others things. I still and will always believe those no matter what. This morning as I was walking, praying, and listening to music this song came on. And as I was praying I realized just how much I believe in Love.

I believe God so loved the world that He gave His ONLY Son so that we could, if we choose to, experience everlasting life. Because of that love nothing can remove me from the hand of my God... I can not lose my place in heaven. I can however take myself way from Him and lose fellowship with Him, even then He will always love me and have me in His hand.

I believe that Jesus loved me enough, to suffer utter humiliation, pain, torture, and death on the cross. He's love was complete and all He asks for in return is for us to believe and follow Him, to love Him back.

I believe that because I have accepted this Love of God and Jesus that I have the Holy Spirit living in me and that he guides me to the people that I am supposed to love in order to fulfill my calling here on earth. Jesus left us with 2 commands, Love God with all your heart, soul, spirit, and mind;
and love others as you love yourself.

So I believe in a Faith that is strong, and a Hope that will carry on... and that these will allow me to LOVE others as God wants me to....

Lord Help me to believe more in faith, and hope, and LOVE. Help me to love others so to show them just how much you love them. Thank you for ALL the love you have shown me!

The Drawing:

AGAIN

This entry is going to be a little different.... so hang with me...

Have you every had something that you really liked, something you created, a one of a kind thing that disappeared? A few years ago I bought a porcelain cup similar to the one in this picture. I had drawn on it like in the drawing here.

When I left school (work) on November 28, 2012, I left my mug on my desk so it would be there when I return on Monday, I was having a tooth pulled and would not be going back for a few days. Little did I know I was going to have a heart attack on November 30. I did not return to work for a week or more. My mug was gone when I return. I looked everywhere for it and asked everyone. I have not found it. So my daughter bought me the new one above for Christmas. I have not drawn on it, until today because I could not figure out what I wanted to do. Today, while using it at school I decided...

Now, I will begin to fill in the voids, the space with doodles like I have many times for pictures on this blog. I may even use color. I will post the finished mug in a blog when it is finished... It may take a while it took me at least 4 months to do the other one... so here I go again...

The Quote:

"Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently." ~Henry Ford

The Drawing... is on the mug :)

BE____!

Be is a verb in order for it to be active it needs a "qualifying" word to follow it. Like be happy, be healthy, be awesome, and many more. God has a great many "be ____!" statements in the bible and I thought I would write about a few of them today.

"Be still and know that I am God;" (Psalms 46:10) God wants us to be still sometimes and just live in that present moment in Him and only Him. to understand that He was, is, and always be right there and He was, is and always be exalted by all things in heaven and earth.

"The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear?.... Though an army may encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; though war may rise against me, in this I will be confident." (Psalms 27) The Lord wants us to be confident in the fact that He has our back. Even when wars rage all around us, and our lives are in turmoil, He has our backs, be confident!

"My soul will be joyful in the Lord; it shall rejoice in His salvation." (Psalms 35:9) We are to be joyful, but not just giggle and happy, we are to joy in the fact that God has provided salvation for us. In this case David was speaking of the salvation from His enemies, those wishing to harm him. God provides that but He has also provided a way out from the penalty of sin. We should be joyful in that also!

"Oh God, you are my God; early will I seek you... My soul will be satisfied..." (Psalms 63:5) God wants us to be satisfied with everything He has given us, everything we have in our lives, the good and the bad. That is hard, really hard, our self wants to always be happy and we are always wanting more we seem to never be satisfied...

"Be strong and of good courage..." (Joshua 1:6) Joshua was about to cross over the Jordan and proclaim the land that God had promised Israel and he was very scared. He knew a long time ago that God was on there side. He had been among the 12 that went to spy on the land, He and Caleb were the ones that said lets go now... Now God is having to remind him.... I am here, be strong, I promised and my promise is good! We need to be strong also. God has made many promises to us, and He will make good on them... the rainbow is still in the sky isn't it?!

"I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content." (Philippians 4:11) "And having food and clothing with these we shall be content." (I Timothy 6:8) This is the same as satisfied really. The thing is this is Paul speaking not David. He is in jail, not in the king of a nation. Paul had a reason to be depressed, lonely, malcontent, yet in all things he was content, satisfied, and thankful. God wants us all to be content in whatever our circumstances. Again it is very hard to do!

"...Warn those who are unruly, comfort the fainthearted, uphold the weak, be patient with all." (I Thessalonians 5:14) This is all about exhorting and admonishing others... it needs to be done patiently... I am terrible at this, I am not very patient, and I try not to pray for patience cause as soon as I do I will be given a trial to work through...

"And a servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all..." (II Timothy 2:24) Paul was making sure Timothy understood that being patient wasn't enough, he needed to be gentle also. We will get more accomplished when we are gentle with people. I have a hard time seeming gentle because of the gruffness of my voice. I need to work on this.

The last "Be" I want to talk about is the "Beatitudes" I am not going to type them all here, they are found in Matthew 5. Jesus was teaching his disciples who the people that would inherit the kingdom of heaven would be. He told them they needed to be meek, poor, to seek after righteousness, to show mercy, to be pure in heart, peacemakers and mourn (I think for the lost). These are all attitudes we should have toward God and others. I strive to meet each of these yet fail often, I know that if I continue to try to meet them, maybe some day I will. You know what though I think God like any father should be proud of His child for trying to do their best.

Lord, help me to "Be ____!" whatever it is that you want me to be. Your word says all these and more, help me Lord learn to be still, content, strong, satisfied, confident and on and on... Thank-you Lord for all that you do for me.

The Quote: I don't know who I first heard say this, but I have heard it said many times in Church....

"The Beatitudes are the way your attitudes should be." ~Anonymous

The Drawing:

  

ROUTINE

....This is for a friend who knows who she is.... Yes, this word has been used... it is all good!

Routine, familiar patterns, they lead us in a since of security and when those routines are changed unexpectedly or on purpose it can be difficult to adjust. I have said it before and I will say it again, change can be good.

Every year the is a familiar pattern for the lives of children. They go to school from August or September to May or June... Unless of course they go to a year round school, which in that case their lives are even more routine. Then they get out for summer, a break from "routine", but still a part of the routine of a child's life. Even parents have a routine that follow this schedule, while kids are at school things are "normal"; during the summer not so much. We know it is going to happen it is not unexpected, so why is it so hard to get back into the routine? Why isn't it like turning on a light switch?

Humans just don't like change, period. It is hard to give up "freedoms" of summer, for the hustle and bustle of getting up at such and such time, driving this child here, that one the opposite direction. Those with small kids long for them to be older so they can be more independent, so they can drive themselves.... then when they are able to do that you long for them to be small again so you can protect them and care for them. We don't like change!

Now, to encourage my friend and anyone else who may be reading this.... the change you are going through today will not break you... you will survive and come out the other side alive... your "new" routine will become a habit, and you will be longing for something different again... We don't like change, yet when we get in a routine we wish it was more exciting, less routine, something different. It always seems that the routine that settles into habit eventually becomes mundane.

Lord, I pray for everyone longing for a set routine so life is a little easier. Help the changes and transition to go smoothly, and help it not to become mundane. I pray especially for my friend to find her pace and the things she needs to make her life all it needs to be.

The Quote:

"I like having a routine, because everything else... is so unpredictable" ~Jordana Brewster

The Drawing:

SIMPLE

Simple, easy, laid back.... that is the way we all want life to be, so why is life so difficult. We make it difficult is the reason. We allow it to be that way. Life can me simple if we would stop making it so hard. So how do we do that?

I believe we make life hard by making rules, boundaries, expectations, and obstacles we can not possible keep. I am not saying we should not have them, the problem is that we have too many and the bars are set too high. The Israelite people in the old testament were given a set of laws from God. They added a bunch too them, most of which could never have been kept. In fact the bible says in Romans that the law was given to show us our sin. There is no way a person could keep all of the over 600 laws in the old testament.

Jesus was asked, which is the greatest commandment (Matthew 22), and he answered by saying that the first and greatest was Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind. Then he said and the second is like it love others as you love yourself. He went on to say that on these two hang all the other laws. This means, to me, that we only need two rules; Love God and Love others. If we can do this we will have a simple life. Treat people the way you want to be treated and Love God the way He should be loved, which means we do everything to glorify and honor Him. Now that is simple right? The problem is we add things to it, we try to make it about us instead of about Him, Pride gets in the way. Like, I have to give this much money so I can give the most, or hug this many people so people will see how much I care, or work at the homeless shelter so many hours, so people will know I am volunteering a lot. God just said to love Him, give Him what you can in a way that will honor and glorify Him. He will lead you in the things that will do that if you let Him and in the process we learn to love others. If you do it for His glory you can't get in the way and make it hard.

Lord, I want my life to be simple. I simply want to Love, Honor, and Glorify you with all that I do. I want to Love others like I love myself, actually better than I love myself. I want to do this with out pride. Lord, lead and guide me in this, I know I can not do it on my own, help me Lord to live a simple life.

The Quote:

"Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated." ~Confucius 

The Drawing:

HURT

The Quote:

"You always hurt the one you love, the one you shouldn't hurt at all... with a hasty word you can't recall..." ~ Partial Song written by Doris Fisher and Allan Roberts, preformed by the Mills Brothers

Why is it that we hurt the ones we love? We forget to notice them or we take them for granted. We say words without thinking that cut to the bone. We neglect to tell them just how much they mean to us. We never intentionally try to hurt someone we love, it happens. We are human. Even when we state the truth, or the obvious we can hurt someone.

When I hurt someone, it usually hurts me also. I get upset with myself and worry that the loved one I hurt, will never forgive me or they didn't understand my intentions. It can cause us both a lot of pain. I wonder if we should never tell the truth. There are many husbands out there that will tell their wives a "lie" just to keep from hurting them. I don't think that is right either. I would rather tell the truth and have someone upset with me than to tell a "lie".

So, I find myself often between a rock and a hard place. Sandwiched in between telling the truth and either not saying anything or "lying". I usually take the hard route, and I know I have possibly hurt the person I have told the truth, and they may never speak to me again, I would rather have done that in Love than lied. Keeping it too myself doesn't help either because then it bothers me that the person may get hurt, without the truth. So, why do we hurt the ones we love.... it is because we love them! At least when we are telling the truth.

Lord, I pray that those I love know that if I tell them the truth, I am doing it out of Love. I pray they can forgive me and in turn I can forgive myself. I do not like to hurt people, and I never mean to intentionally hurt someone. Help me to always speak the truth in Love.

The Drawing:

YÂDAʽ

I have been reading the book, "not a fan." by Kyle Idleman. Many times when I read christian books such as this I do so with a little apprehension about what I will find. So far this book has been good and I have gotten this word from it.

YÂDAʽ (Yaw-dah') is not the word I am sure you are familiar with, the one that you say or have heard said to represent empty or boring talk as the Merriam-Webster Dictionary. YÂDAʽ is actually a Hebrew word for the word know and not just any word know. This is the word used in describing the relationship between a husband and a wife, "Adam knew Eve his wife..." (Genesis 4:1) It isn't a casual knowing, this represents a intimate relationship. Throughout the Bible this word is used to describe that way God knows us and the way we should know Him. God wants a deeply intimate relationship with us on a spiritual level. He knows us on this level and has given us the choice to have that kind of relationship with Him. The thing is most of us only want a "yada, yada, yada...." relationship instead of a YÂDAʽ relationship.

So how do we have that kind of relationship with God? What does that look like? The story used to describe the relationship in the bible is a good place to start to answer these questions. The writer was talking about Jesus going to Simon's house for a meal. Simon was a Pharisee and He knew the laws and etiquette rituals of his country. He also knew who he had invited to eat with him although he had no desire to treat him as an honored guest. Jesus was not greeted with a kiss, he was not offered water to wash his feet. As they ate a woman come into the place, she fell at Jesus feet crying, she took her hair down (not something done in public or in front of a man not your husband). She washed Jesus' feet with her tears, and dry them with her hair, then she poured perfume on them and kissed them. She was worshiping her God and honoring him in a YÂDAʽ kind of way. She gave all she had, with out remorse, and without fear. Did people talk about her, Yes! Do you think she cared, I don't! She was unashamed to show her intimate love for the Lord. She was willing to risk everything!

Can we have this kind of love and devotion, this level of intimate relationship with our Lord? Yes, we can! The question is are we willing to change our way of living, our way of worship. Are we willing to reach out to God and know Him like He knows us. The choice is ours. There is a song that asks "If Jesus was here would you walk right by on the other side or fall and worship at His holy feet!" (My Jesus, Todd Agnew)

Lord, I want to YÂDAʽ you. I want to worship you in a way that reflects the love you have given me. I want an intimate relationship with you, Lord. Please help me to find that.

The Quote:

"Oh Lord, You have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I am far away. You see me when I travel and when I am at home. You know everything I do. You know everything I am going to say even before I say it, Lord." ~Psalms 139:1-4 (NLT)

The Drawing:

DILIGENTLY

I have not been very diligent in posting to this blog and I am sorry. I said I would do a word a day and I have not. It is hard to come up with things to say everyday... and bring a fresh perspective to to this blog. I will try to do better.

The Bible uses this word often. In the New Testament the Greek word ĕkzētĕō (ek-zay-teh'-o) is used which translates as investigate, crave, demand, worship, seek after. In the Old Testament the Hebrew word shâchar (shaw-khar') is used which translates as early at any task, to search for, inquire early, rise and seek, seek early in the morning, diligently. In almost every instances that the word diligently is used it has to to with seeking God in some way.

What are some ways to diligently seek God? When should we diligently seek God? Why should we diligently seek God? I think these are very good questions that really every person should ask. And I will say this with confidence, as many people ask these questions there will be just as many answers. Diligently seeking God is a personal matter. I can an will answer these questions here today for me, that does not mean that anyone reading this will answer the question in the same way or even agree with my answers, but like I said seeking God with diligence is a personal matter. So here I go....

What are some ways to diligently seek God? First look at the Greek and Hebrew translations, we need to investigate, worship, crave, demand, and inquire. When we here the word investigate it brings to mind the thought of a detective looking for evidence, I believe we should be just that way in searching for God. He is everywhere and we can investigate everything to find Him. Dig deep in the Word, Listen to the silent breezes, smell the fragrance of the flowers. We need to crave Him enough to want to investigate and when we find Him we need to worship Him. I am not saying to worship a flower because He made it, worship Him for the beauty He has created. In seeking God diligently we can inquire of others about Him, and discuss ideas. We can even demand that we want to see Him, and He will make Himself known. He will not appear physically, although He could, but He will show Himself in a way that there would be no denying He was present.

When should we diligently seek God? The Hebrew word says early, and in the morning. When I read what Strong's Concordance said about early at any task, I thought of the phrase "the early bird catches the worm." Worms come out of the ground at night, and birds that hunt at dawn before the worms start to go back under ground are the lucky ones. So early in the morning maybe the best time for some. I personally read my bible and spend time in prayer and study right after I get up and get dressed. Some people need to wait until later in the day, or before bed at night. Just because I study in the mornings does not mean that I am not seeking all day. The Bible says, "Pray without ceasing." I Thessalonians 5:17. I think that we seek God when we pray and without ceasing would be diligently, right?

Why should we diligently seek God? Well, one obvious reason is because He is God and deserves to be sought after. Beyond that we need Him and His guidance in our lives, we need to feel love and wanted when it seems no one loves or wants us here. We need His mercy, love, grace, patience, strength, and even judgement in our lives. To me without Him life is to hard to handle and not worth living. If He was not in my life I can not imagine where I would be, I do know it would not be good.

I can say I do not always follow these things I have stated here, I am human and I stumble way more than I should. I am trying to live the life God wants for me, with all the ups and downs that keep me on my toes and growing spiritually. It is my prayer that I can attempt to seek God more diligently everyday.

Thank-you Lord for loving me enough to allow me to seek you, now let it be with diligence and without complaining. You are worthy of my devotion, even though I am not worthy of your love. I praise you Lord for all you have been, are, and will be in my life, Thank-you!

The Quote:

"But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek after Him." ~Hebrews 11:6

The Drawing:

TRUTH

Okay, before I begin ranting today I have to say something. I raised myself in an Independent Fundamental Baptist Church from the age of 11 until I around 23. I went to an Independent Fundamental Baptist College and received a Bachelor Degree. I have nothing against that group or people who believe in fundamental ideas. I believe many of them myself. This one thing hit me today a little wrong and I have to talk about it... so here goes!

The Bible is the inspired WORD of GOD! I believe that with all my heart... the Bible has the answers to all the questions of this world in some way or another, it is TRUTH. Now here is the thing,

 "The Bible was inscribed over a period of 2000 years, in times of war and in days of peace, by kings, physicians, tax collectors, farmers, fishermen, singers, and shepherd...." ~Casting Crowns - "The Word is Alive"

It contains, history, philosophy, love stories, fiction (parables are technically fictions to get a point across), laws, biographies, poetry, songs, and many other works of literature. It is still Truth. It was written in a time when I doubt the English language was even a language yet. Most of the Old Testament was written in Hebrew, while the New Testament was written in Greek. For many years, the books of the bible were copied over and over, even the Kings of the Old Testament were told to copy the manuscripts by their own hand and keep it close to their heart. So for someone to say that one certain version of the English Bible is the only true Bible that bothers me a bit. God says,

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways my ways." says the Lord. "For as the heavens are higher that the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts higher than your thoughts." "For as the rain comes down, and the snow from heaven, and do not return there, but water the earth, and make it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall My word be that goes forth from my mouth; It shall not return to Me void, But it shall accomplish what I please, and it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it."  ~Isaiah 55:8-11

If we should think that any Bible is the pure truth it should be the original text. With that said, I do believe God inspired some men to bring the Bible together the way He wanted it. I believe that many translations of the Bible have been written because God has allowed it so that ALL can hear, have hope, understand, seek wisdom, guidance, and find the Love of the Savior! (2 Timothy 3:15-17; Romans 15:4; Hebrews 4:12; I Peter 2:2; Psalm 119:10-11)

The Bible even says we are to interpret the word for ourselves (2 Timothy 2:15). I know that the Holy Spirit is still working today and He inspires people to interpret God's word in a way that they can understand. Just like I am doing now. I know many people will not agree with me, and I will admit I am not perfect I do not know the answer... I believe that The Word of God is Truth and will not return void, even if it isn't filled with thee's and thou's, or if it has common language so someone just learning to read can understand it, it is God's word. He has allowed these other versions of His Word to enter the world, I think He has done it so that MANY will come to a knowledge of Him.

Now all this started because a friend of mine posted something about the New King James Version of the Bible not being the same as the King James Version and how it is causing problems. God has allowed both to be in print and neither one of them are the original text, I believe they are both inspired by God, as the New International, The Amplified Version, The Phillips Translation, The Message, Good News for Modern Man, and I could go on and on... People, I believe it doesn't matter what translation of the Bible we use as long as it tells the Story of Jesus and leads us to a closer walk with Him. God's Word will not come back void!

The Quote:

"So shall My word be that goes forth from my mouth; It shall not return to Me void, But it shall accomplish what I please, and it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it."  ~Isaiah 55:11

The Drawing:

ANNOYING

Lately, I feel that I have been annoying some of my friends to much. I want to chat too much on Facebook, they don't really want too. It probably seems I am there every time they login... I see when they come on and I say "Hi", or "how was your day?" Many times it seems like they can't get off fast enough and never answer me. This is why I know I must be becoming a nuisance. I am going to attempt to explain why I am annoying, but it still isn't right... I know that and I will try to not be a bother any more.

I sit here every night alone. Occasionally, I have a friend that I have dinner with, and lately I have been walking in the evening with another friend. Other than that I am at home alone. I do not watch TV and even if I do, it does not fill the void of wanting someone to talk to. I go to work every day, I come home, I go for a walk, and then I am alone. On the weekends, I basically spend the time alone except for Sunday. Actually out of all the days of the week Sunday is my fullest, even though many times I still feel alone and like a third wheel, or that the people that I am with are allowing me to be there because they tolerate or pity me. What is worse is I will allow them to do that because I don't want to be alone.

I know I am venting and airing laundry that the world doesn't need to see or read...   this is my blog... a weblog... a journal of sorts. I hope that those who read it will understand that they may know someone just like me... they may be able to reach out and make that person feel better about themselves and give them someone to connect with. I am also writing this to let my friends who I have been annoying to know I am sorry... I care about you all or I would not want to talk to you and know how your day is going... I plan to do less of that... cause I know if I can see when you are online you can see when I am online and if you want to talk to me.... I will be there... again sorry for being so ANNOYING!

The Quote:

"I'm aware that I can be annoying." ~Sandra Bullock

The Drawing:

WILL

This would have been my Mother's 75th Birthday today.... Happy Birthday Mom!

The Quote:

"In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." ~ I Thessalonians 5:18

Will: desire, wish, appetite, passion...

A will, we all have one. We have hopes and dreams we wish for them to come true. We desire to have many things. We have a passion for something, an appetite. Our will changes over time. Our passions, appetite, desires, and wishes change for many reasons.

I have a passion for teaching, and I desire to continue to teach even after I retire from that profession. That was not always my passion, desire, or wish. When I was little I wanted to be a Veterinarian just like Daktari. I don't imagine many of you will remember that show, it was one of my favorites growing up. As I grew, I wanted to couple that with working with people as a Missionary. Then God interjected His Will for my life and called me to be a Missionary, not as a Veterinarian, but as a teacher and not in another country, but in my own. Our passions and desires change over time. I have been doing that mission work for 30 years. Now after 30 years, I have had the opportunity to go to a country not my own and teach. At first I was reluctant to go.... Now, I desire to continue doing that if it is God's Will.

God has a perfect will for each person's life. First and foremost it is that every person come to know Him as their one and only God. After that, He needs us to work to further His Kingdom, His perfect will for our lives will always provide opportunities to draw people to Him. Does God want me to go back to Croatia? Does He want me to go to teach English, or something else? Will He guide me in what He wants me to do? I believe He will, I need to let my will be His will. I need to be willing to give up everything to follow Him. God has a Will for my life... I want to be in the center of that will!

The Drawing:

UPSTREAM

Yesterday while listening to the message at church I thought of this word in reference to something the preacher said. His sermon was about Christians being winners, yet this came up in a way and I am taking off with it.

I thought of Salmon travelling upstream, against the current. It is a life journey for the Salmon to come back to its birthplace to the end of its life. To get back to this place they must, maneuver around obstacles, jump over water falls, avoid predators, and travel hundreds of miles. Then after the long journey and having spawn a new generation, they die.

In the world there is a current that flows in one direction. Yet, God said in Romans 12:2 "not to be conformed by the world." The current of the world can engulf a person and cause them to want to blend in and go with the flow, not to stand out and be different. Yet, that is exactly what God said we are to do if we are Christians.

We need to travel against the natural current in order to be what God wants us to be. We have to avoid obstacles, like pride and addictions. We have to beware of predators, like Satan, old friends, and even ourselves. We have to navigate waterfalls and floods of emotions, pain, sorrow, joy, happiness, and love. We have to travel many, many miles to get to our destination. And all along the way we are supposed to be bringing new followers with us. The greatest thing about the upstream travels is that at the end of it all there is not death..... but eternal life! A life that will be so much better than the one we have here, where everyone is on the same path and the flow is in the same direction, the right direction.

Lord, I pray that I can be like the Salmon and fight the upstream current to get to the destination you have for me. I know it will be hard, and I have a lot to learn as I go against the flow. Help me Lord to not give up, to navigate the obstacles, to avoid the predators, especially myself, and to find friends along the way to come too.

The Quote:

Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream." ~ W.C. Fields 

The Drawing:

CONFIDENCE

Here are some of the definitions of this word from the dictionary....Confidence: a feeling or consciousness of one's power or of reliance of one's circumstances; faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper, or effective way; the quality or state of being certain; a relation of trust or intimacy; the quality or state of being certain.

Well, that is a lot to consider when looking at the word. God tells us many times in His word to be Bold, and Confident! Is that the same as believing in our own power, as in the first definition? Does it mean we should have faith or belief in the one that will act in the right, proper or effective way? Does it mean we should put our trust in the ability of our state of being certain a thing is true? Should we have confidence in a relationship if it is based in trust and intimacy? What should we place our confidence in?

God wants us to trust Him, to be confident that He will take care of use. We should not trust our own power ever, look at Adam... when left alone with false teaching and a single idea that was planted in his head.... He chose the wrong path. he did not keep his trust and confidence in what he knew to be truth... the WORD of God... that said , do not eat of that tree or you WILL die....

We need to have the faith and the ability to trust in God and God alone, then we will have the confidence to Boldly approach God and ask for whatever we want in His will and He WILL give it to us.... the only way to be that confident is to be in His will, to daily seek His guide, and to faithfully put our trust in HIM!

Lord Help me to confidently come before you with petitions that are in your will and seek your guidance in regard to my life. I want to be in your will and do your will daily. Lord give me the wisdom to do that. Give me the desire to follow you daily, completely!

The Quote:

"And this is the confidence that we have in Him that if we ask anything according to His will He will hear us" ~I John 5:14

The Drawing:

NEVER-ENDING

God's love and grace are never-ending and ever-reaching. Today, I was reading a devotion from YouVersion.com "Elisha: A Tale of Ridiculous Faith" in the story, Elisha helped the widow woman whose sons were about to be taken away as slaves because she own money. He told her to get her boys to collect as many empty jars as they could, then she was to go into her house and pour from her one small jar of oil into each of those containers. As long as there were containers, there was oil to fill them. Final, she asked for another jar, her son said there are no more and the oil stopped. God provided for her enough oil to sell to keep her family together. Her cup literally ran over and she had Joy unspeakable.

How often do we take for granted the provisions God makes for us this way on a daily basis? He provides in so many ways and we think what a good job we do at providing for ourselves. I believe I only have the things I have because God has allowed me to have them. Yet, I hardly ever notice it until my money runs out and I need something, then I realize when that something is provided whether it be the money or the thing, that it is by God's hand I have it. I need to thank God every day for everything! If he did not provide for me from His bountiful storehouse I would have nothing. I can never out give Him... His provision is never-ending, His makes my cup overflow, and I should have joy unspeakable because of it. To many times I forget.

Thank-you Lord for you never-ending provision, love, and grace. Help me to stop taking it for granted or claiming it under my own power.

The Quotes:

"My cup runs over" Psalm 23:5

"Bring another vessel." "There is not another" Then the oil stopped. II Kings 4:6

"Joy unspeakable and full of glory" ~Barney E. Warren

The Drawing:

 

 

NEW

Today is a New Day... It is also the start of a New School Year.

I am reminded today that I need to look at each of the students with newness. I need to forget who they were last year and remember that they have had 2 months to change and grow. There will also be students who are new to our school and I need to remember that everyone from the youngest to the oldest, child and adult comes to this year with baggage that I know nothing about. They carry it openly or secretly and it unfortunately causes them to react in certain ways. I want this year to be a great year for everyone!!!

Lord, help me to see everyone who walks through the door with your eyes, and help each to grow in a way this year that only you guide me in my teaching. Help each come ready to learn and seek knowledge that they need to succeed in this world. Thank-you Lord for them all.

The Quote:

"Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant." ~Robert Louis Stevenson

The Drawing:

EVERYTHING

You can't always be everything to everyone, because then you can never be you for you. I am sure you may not understand that, sometimes I am not sure I understand myself. Let me try and explain why I feel that way.

I know that I am a hard person to get to know, I also know that if you get past who you think I am, you will see who I really am. then everything will be ok. There are people in this world who could care less about who I am really, they want me to be something I can not be. I am hard to get to know and I am rough and gruff, I know that. With that said, I have not tried to intentional be mean to anyone. Even people who have done me wrong, I do not or try to not have a mean bone toward them. Sometimes the way I say things and the expressions I give are not meant the way they are perceived.  And yet those who choose to see me only at face value want me to conform to who they think I should be. I try to speak in a less rough tone, and I will continue to try.

I hold people at arms length, and I have a wall between me and the world. There are few people who have been allowed inside. I am trying to change that also. It is hard, and with God's help I can start to let more in. I can tell you those who are not willing to allow me to be me, will probably never get past  the wall at all. I can not change for people on this earth, God is working with me and He is not finished. I may never get rid of the gruffness and roughness until I get to heaven, I may never let any more inside my wall, and guess what if you can't except that then it is your problem. Again with that said, I am trying to be the person I should be, if I try to be someone that someone else wants me to be, I am not true to me. I am working on my faults, and maybe instead of looking for ways to change who someone else is, you (and I) should try to change the flaws we have.

I know I may not have cleared up my statement... Here goes.... I can not be what everyone in the world thinks I should be.... if I do that I can never be who I need to be for me... I have to be who I am....

God help me to change the things I can in my personality, Lord let them be because I can and should change them not because the "world" expects it. I am not here to please people, I am here to please you! Thank-you Lord for making me the person I am with all my faults and failures, because I know you do not make anything that is ugly. I am just a work in progress, the others have to except it or move on!

The Quote:

"God knows me thoroughly, yet loves me completely" ~Proverbs 31 Ministries

The Drawing:

STEP

I know another word I have "done" sort of and yes, it is about the same thing.... FAITH. That has been my theme a lot in these blogs, maybe because I need more, maybe because I need to exercise it more, or maybe someone who reads this needs a little encouraging. Whatever the reason here I go again.

This year I stepped out on faith and went to Croatia. Since my return, a lot of things have happened that have caused me to have the idea that I am to return in some capacity. If it is teaching great, if not that is ok also, I am still not sure if it is even the Lord's will. This I do know, I have to step away from my secure position, I need to start saving money, keep in contact with those who are in Croatia and those here who could help me go back. I step way from that position and step toward a destiny. In my sight right now it is a dim vision of what I think that destiny will be and may not be even the one God has for me. He may lead me in a completely different path. Where ever this step takes me I will go, I have to have the faith to step.

So, good-bye security and hello destiny whatever it may be. Lord, thank you for the opportunities you have given me and those that are before me. Whatever your will for my life is I am stepping out. Make my faith to continue strong and give me the vision as I move along your path.

The Quote:

"To step toward your destiny you have to step away from your security." ~Craig Groeschel

The Drawing:

GRIND

This summer has been too fast. I guess the old saying, "Time flies when you are having fun!" is true. In many ways I wish I didn't have to go back to work, yet I know that is not possible yet. So I go back to the "grind".

Now, I could mean to use the word grind in a negative way, because working is so hard and that would be true. It is hard to get up before the rooster calls and inspire little children to want to learn. To teach them the things they need to be successful in life. It is even harder when you can't reach some no matter what or when you know some of their little lives are so full of sadness at such young ages. A job like teaching can be very hard, and it becomes a grind.

I could also mean it in a good way. I want to go back to the grind. I want to be ground up and a little bit of who I am be given to each and every person I come in contact with. A part given that helps give them hope, love, or encouragement. I want them to come away from this year of school knowing that I truly care for them and that a piece of me will forever be with them. I want to be ground up like pepper and sprinkled on the lives of those I teach and work with so that their lives may be seasoned and full of taste!

Lore, help me be an encouragement, let me give hope, love, and knowledge to all those I teach and work with. Help me be seasoning for their lives. Grind me up and share me with them all Lord.

The Quote:

"In any profession it gets to be a grind" ~Denzel Washington

The Drawing:

 

SIGHT

Jesus gave sight to many blind people during his time on earth. He healed all these people in different ways. One, He made mud and put it on his eyes and told him to go wash it in a specific pool.  Another he just spoke to and he was heals. Still another he touched and asked him if he could see, yet this story does not end here, because the man replied I can see people and the trees, then Jesus touched him again and he saw everything clearly (Mark 8:22-25). If he could see trees and people didn't that mean he had sight. That was what he wanted, why did Jesus touch him again?

Physical sight is something many of probably take for granted all to often. We take our spiritual sight for grant mush more often. As creations of God we were given a "free" will, to make decisions right or wrong. We also were given a spirit or conscience. That spirit gives us spiritual sight, to know and discern right and wrong, thoughts, actions, emotions, and other things. Now maybe this man's sight physically needed to be healed, and also his spiritual sight. Like many of ours may need healing. 

I spend a lot of time online, watching TV and media, and talking about things, I know, I see and hear things that are not very spiritually uplifting. The more I do this the blinder I get to the discerning spirit I have been given. As a christian I should be controlled by the Holy Spirit, I sometimes allow spiritual blinders to be in place and I do what I know I should not. I need my sight to be healed quite often. So I need to reach out to Jesus and ask for my sight to be healed! Then maybe I can see all that He has for me to see, clearly!

Lord, please help me to gain the spiritual sight that you long for me to have. Help me to see the things you wish for me to see with the sight and vision only you can give. 

The Quote:

"The most pathetic person is someone who has sight, but has no vision." ~ Helen Keller  

The Drawing:

 

WEEDS

I may have said this before in this blog and I am sorry if I have. I know I have thought it before and I have written it, just not sure where...

Have you thought about how some of the most beautiful flowers are weeds? There are some that I think are more beautiful than roses. Dandelions are beautiful and fun, there are little pink and purple flowers on some that are stunning when photographed. Do you think God had a lesson in this? I do.... There is a lesson in all things... 

Weeds usually represent a bad thing something that makes your lawn or garden ugly. They come in and try to take over everything, they multiply quickly if they are not taken care of, because that kind of plant has to have partners. 

Now here is the idea.... We are weeds! I am sinful, without God I am ugly, and hateful. I go where I shouldn't and I multiply my weediness where ever I go. My weediness is not any worse than anyone else, it is all sin! Alone I can not help myself, I sin and I like it. If I let God in my weedy life there is a change, I am still a weed, I still sin and make mistakes, that never changes although I should strive to be sinless. The marvelous thing is He makes this weed something beautiful, He gives me a flower to show the world, one that is His creation. He makes the ugly, beautiful! 

Thank-you Lord for making weeds, and giving them flowers. Thank-you for loving me and making my weedy life beautiful.

The Quote:

"What is a weed? A plant whose virtues have never been discovered." ~Ralph Waldon Emerson

The Drawing: I thought I would add some photos of "weeds" also :)

  

FROG

FROG is an acronym for "Fully Rely on God"

Is it possible to fully rely on God? I believe it is. I think many people take this statement the wrong way. I should rely on God to supply my needs and take care of me just as Jesus said He did for the sparrow, and the flowers of the fields. As he did for the Israelite people in the wilderness, Elijah, or Daniel. In each of these later instances God provided for the person, yet a little work on their part had to be done. The Israelite people had to go out and gather just enough manna from what the Lord provided. Elijah had to seek out the widow woman who supplied him bread, and Daniel had to be faithful and diligently pray even when the odds were against him.

God wants to give us all we need to allow us to live the life He has for us. We can't sit back and expect it to fall in our laps. We need to "pray like it depends on God and work like it depends on us." (Mark Batterson) So it means taking a leap of faith, and being a FROG! Jump out into the pond and swim like you know how too. God will do the rest.

Lord Help me to jump... Give me the wisdom to follow the path you have provided and to be content in all that I have. Help me to use it to your honor and glory.

The Quote:

"Therefore, humble yourself under the might hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him for He cares for you." ~I Peter 5:6-7

The Drawing:

  

ALONE

I should only care about what God wants and needs from me, not people, right. Not really, at least not totally.

It is hard to just look to God for love and acceptance. We are creatures who were created to love, share, and embrace each other and God. We desire to have others in our lives because He created us to. He created us to love Him first and foremost, and love others as much as if not better than ourselves.

I am alone here in my house with my pets. Some would say if I have pets I should not feel alone... well I do, pets don't talk much and even if my cat does like to hug it is not a substitute for having a person to talk to and be around. Then I when I seek out people to talk to even if it is here online I feel like I am being a bother or a pest. Everyone I know in town have family and friends they "hang" out with, and I feel like a third wheel. If I try to start a group for a bible study or just getting together, one maybe two people show up. And that is great! those groups don't last long though. I want to start another bible study, the thing is that most everyone I know is so busy with children, grandchildren, obligations and other things to get together. I will try though, and I have to realize that if it doesn't work out it is not a rejection of me, it is a conflict of time and interest. That is the hard part for me, I look at it as being my fault. I just wish I didn't have to stay by myself so much is all.

Lord, help me to be content with being alone when I have to be. In those times help me to see you as my comfort and friend. Help me to happy to be with people when I am.

The Quote:

"Pray that your loneliness may spur you into finding something to live for, great enough to die for." ~ Dag Hammarskjold

 The Drawing: